Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
