its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize