I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
