i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
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