so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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