Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I feel great
I just peed on a car
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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