Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
