THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
