thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Vodka?
Forever.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
