I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Randomize
