I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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