so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize