your room smells of hookers.
And success
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
