no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
