so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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