yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
