did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
