how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
