I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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