Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
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