Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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