u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Oh god it's open bar.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
