I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
