Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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