Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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