the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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