I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize