I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
