I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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