that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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