Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
