Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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