it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
