The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
