I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Randomize
