and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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