when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
