is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
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