at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
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