sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
