Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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