I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
