I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
