Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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