i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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