I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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