whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
id be glad to
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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