im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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