Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
