We're like a lot better than the average bears
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
